It's amazing looking back at this year, sure i've been getting better with the lack of journals but it's nice returning to why I did them in the first place.... Winter slumps.
Now I'm done with winter and dunzo first year at college!
and who says I don't have to do these blogs anymore?
sure they help with tough times but they do something else,
They give me that central idea that I myself is a human being with problems and human disfunctions who I myself can help out.... and wouldn't have it any other way.
I mean I work through my thoughts and pry each word from my rusty old mind to give a sense...
a sense of what I am feeling right at this moment. Sure some last longer but there is nothing more liberating then seeing how far you've come over a course of a year.
I look at all the old people in my course upwards of 25 and they all seem like nothing is as good as it used to be. I'm ready to grow up but if these years are as good as everyone says they are, and they are, then I'm holding on.... making a reminder that I'm here and every part of me is along with it and I'm not gunna change for anyone.
I got something this year that really made me proud to be alive, a sense of a bigger world around me and the way I fit in it, It's a great place with admission but, heh, I get what I want....
whether that changes or not it doesn't really matter.
cause I got what I need.
oh man the tracks on "Wild Horses" now....
time for a listen
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